| I would often say to myself that if only I could | | | | could not bare the thought of having the stutter |
| some how manage to gain confidence that my | | | | for the whole of my life. |
| stutter would then surely go. It was a bit of a | | | | There seemed to be certain patterns attached to |
| catch twenty-two situation in reality. The reason | | | | my own stutter. I would stutter more when I |
| that I had a lack of confidence was mainly due to | | | | was tired, when I was under pressure, when I |
| the fact that I had the stutter. What I felt was | | | | was stressed out and when I was feeling down |
| required was some form of confidence course | | | | or depressed. If I was in a real happy mood I |
| for people who stutter. | | | | would hardly stutter at all. |
| I have never accepted second best in life and this | | | | At the age of around sixteen I started to drink |
| is one of the reasons that I used to become | | | | alcohol. This was another big turning point in my |
| frustrated when attending speech therapy. At the | | | | life as I found that the alcohol would increase my |
| time it seemed that this was the only form of | | | | confidence and that the stutter would then slowly |
| treatment for people who had a stutter. The | | | | disappear. This of course was a false confidence |
| speech therapists however seemed clueless about | | | | but it was another example of how stuttering and |
| what it was like living life with this horrible stutter | | | | confidence are inter-linked. |
| hanging over one's head and freely admitted that | | | | A few years later at the age of twenty-two I |
| they were unable to help cure it. To be fair to | | | | decided to attempt to complete this stuttering |
| them they were trying their best and at least | | | | jigsaw. It took me about eleven years however I |
| they were being honest. | | | | did finally manage to eradicate the stutter from |
| This was still however not satisfactory to me, I | | | | my life completely. |